Random thoughts
You know the more I think about it the more I'm sure that God is good. Just wanted to put it in writing, cause lord knows I don't say it often enough. I've completed my adoption training class over the weekend. To say the least, it was an emotional ordeal for me, but thinking back I have to say its been a healthy experience. Its not good to let old wounds get too well healed. Every once in a while you have to rip the scar open and let the sucker bleed a little bit. I say that because the wounds that so often we tell ourselves are healed are really just in hiding. They can be affecting us in a million differnt ways we're not even aware of. The only way to live a life not dominated by our past is to look backwards every once in a while and examine the things that still haunt us. In the end the temporary suffering that this provokes fades away and we are left with a greater understanding of ourselves, so that even those tears we shed show themselves eventually to be a blessing.

I'll not pretend any wisdom to you. I've no profound answers I've kulled from my past, but I think I understand myself more now than I have at any point in my life. I'm not angry with God anymore. Maybe thats a start towards making my peace, I don't know. What I do know is I can pray now and be okay with the person I'm praying to. That at least is a blessing. But like I said, God is good.